Like an idiot for inventing pregnancy symptoms during the two week wait.
Like a jerk for daring to be disappointed after one measly month.
Like I am having a hard time reading the posts of several of my favorite bloggers who are newly pregnant with their seconds.
Unbelievably grateful that I’m not feeling the unpleasant side effects of being pregnant right now.
Like maybe I’m being overly cautious by doing the follicle checks. After all, we caught the ectopic early and I didn’t have surgery, just a little methotrexate. The damage must be quite minimal.
Like I’m rationalizing to get to the answer I want.
Like trying to conceive is like crack, and I just don’t want to skip a month so I’m rationalizing to get to the answer I want.
Like I’ll feel like an even bigger idiot if I don’t do the monitoring and I wind up with another ectopic on the left side and lose another four months, not to mention the actual unpleasantness of the ectopic.
Confused.
Go ahead and tell me what to do. Just don’t use the word “assvice.” I hate that word and it doesn’t apply anyway because I’m actually asking for your thoughts and advice.
